I hit the big 50 today! YAHHHOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! I’m so thankful for all of the support my family, friends and all my readers out there have given me. Often when I feel like giving up, I think of you all and remind myself to keep going. While I’ve had amazing support, I’ve come to also realize, I can’t do this without myself either. When it all boils down, I have to make the choice. Everyone can support me and encourage me, but unless I’m will to make that decision, it doesn’t matter how much support people give me. It’s up to me to make the right food choices, to go out for a walk, to hit the gym. So today, I give a shout out to myself. I am so proud of myself and the person I’ve become. This got me thinking . . . . What’s change and what’s unchanged?
Changes
• My vegetable consumption used to primarily consist of French fries. I now eat broccoli, cauliflower, spinach, carrots, snow peas, peppers, the occasional small tomato and the list goes on and on.
• Working out was not even part of my vocabulary much less part of a weekly schedule. I now work to get 3 work outs in a week and sometimes more. I’m learning to push myself harder and trust my body can handle it.
• I was outgrowing my size 22W pants and on my way to the dreaded 24W. I now no longer fit in plus size shirts and will never have to purchase a pair of plus size pants again. Good bye Lane Bryant, I will not miss shopping in you. I love feeling “normal” and being able to shop at any store I please.
• My eating habits used to consist of stuffing my face until I could barely walk, this could mean eating a whole Chipotle burrito (including chips), a large diet coke, and sometimes finishing off the night with a trip to coldstone (I can’t believe I’m sharing this with people). If we splurge and go to Chipotle, I now eat ½ a burrito, drink water and NO COLDSTONE. This new way of eating applies to how I choose my food every day. I no longer eat until I can’t walk; I enjoy food more than I ever have.
• I’m more self conscious of my body than ever, while before I never noticed or really paid attention to how big I really was. Now I notice every roll on my body, which seems to be more. I think it’s the way I loose weight, instead of a big tummy bulge, I have a bunch of littler bulges that move and shake when you push on them.
• Best of all, I’m so much happier and at peace with life. This is the happiest I think I’ve ever been in life. I’m at peace with the passing of my son and am okay with “moving forward”. I’m more confident in what I can accomplish and have such a strong belief in myself. I love myself and who I’ve become and look forward to what I will discover in the future.
Unchanged
• I’m still as devoted and committed to my family as I always have been.
• My basic fundamentals remain unchanged.
• I still LOVE LOVE LOVE food and enjoy eating.
• While I’ve lost 50lbs, not a single ounce has left my boobs, can’t figure this one out yet. Not that I’m disappointed, just a little nervous if it never happens, I’ll be at risk of falling over!
• One of my favorite things that brings me great joy is still curling up with Paul in bed, watching a movie, drinking a glass of wine and eating chocolate.
• When I look in the mirror, while I feel drastically different on the inside, I have a hard time seeing those changed on the outside.
• I’m still deeply and madly in love with my husband and feel like the luckiest Mom in the world to have such a great kid.
I will never see those 50lbs again, I can have confidence in that because I’ve change my lifestyle. This isn’t a fad, crash diet or a magic pill, this is life. This is my life and I get to choose my path and my decisions every day. I will continue to put one foot in front of the other and be unstoppable. Thanks for being part of my journey!
Here's me in my "big" pants 50lbs later :)
Unstoppable kiss my junk in the truck goodbye Mariah
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